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ABOUT STACEY
I’ve spent my life trying to understand why people do what they do — and what helps relationships change.
For more than 30 years, I’ve worked with people to understand what shapes the way we respond, communicate and relate to one another. What continues to matter most to me is helping people understand themselves and each other more deeply, so there is more room for honesty, connection and love in the relationships that matter most.
Relationship Repair Coach · ICF PCC · Best-Selling Author · Founder of The Upstream Method™
WHY THIS WORK MATTERS TO ME
I believe the way we love each other at home can shape a life.
I have always been deeply aware of how much our closest relationships matter. The way we speak to one another, listen to one another, repair difficult moments and make room for each other to be human can have an impact that reaches far beyond a single conversation.
That is why this work means so much to me. I want to help people create relationships filled with more kindness, honesty, understanding, connection and love.
Every loving choice we make today has the chance to become part of someone else’s story tomorrow.
EXPERIENCE THAT SHAPES THE WORK
More than 30 years of working with people has taught me that lasting change begins with understanding what is really happening.
My career began in schools, working with children whose behavior was often the first sign that something deeper was going on. I also spent part of my life as a foster mom, which gave me another very personal view of how deeply home, relationships and the adults around a child can matter. Over the years, my work expanded into coaching, training and relationship repair — but the question underneath it has stayed remarkably consistent: what helps people understand themselves, understand one another, and create lasting change?
ICF PCC · MBTI® Practitioner · EQ-i Certified · NLP Master Practitioner · Best-Selling Author
WHAT GUIDES MY WORK TODAY
People change more deeply when they feel understood enough to be honest.
I believe meaningful change begins when we can look honestly at what is happening, understand it with compassion, and take responsibility for the part we can influence.
Understanding comes
first.
Compassion and responsibility can exist together.
Change happens in the moments that matter.
When we understand what is really happening, we have more choice in what we do next.
We can understand why we became who we are without letting the past decide how we continue to show up in the relationships that matter most.
Real change happens when we can respond differently in the moments that used to pull us back into the same pattern.
THE UPSTREAM METHOD™
I created The Upstream Method™ to help people understand what is driving the way they react.
Over more than 30 years of working with people, I kept seeing the same thing: the behavior we notice is rarely where the story begins.
Before someone shuts down, gets defensive, overexplains, lashes out, people-pleases or pulls away, there is usually already something happening underneath — what they thought the moment meant, what they were afraid of, what they believed was happening, what they were feeling, and what they were trying to protect.
The Upstream Method™ helps us become curious about that part of the story.
Because when we understand what is driving a reaction, we have a better chance of responding with awareness, taking responsibility for our part, and choosing something different.
Behavior may be what we see. Understanding what is underneath it is often where change begins.
WHAT WE SEE
Behavior
WHAT WE BECOME CURIOUS ABOUT
Meaning
Beliefs
Feelings
What we’re protecting
Awareness → Responsibility → Change
THE FAMILY PEACE PROJECT
I want more children to grow up knowing home is a place where they are loved, understood and safe to be themselves.
That hope is what led me to create The Family Peace Project — a free project with a goal of helping one million families create homes with more kindness, connection, compassion and love, where love becomes stronger than fear.
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